Uninspired

"The only people that interest me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, desirious of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing but burn, burn, burn, like roman candles across the night"  

- Sal Paradise, On The Road

I complied images on my cork board at the start of the year, quotes, admirable people, amazing films, things I thought were beautiful and I thought would really inspire me during this year. I wanted to be the type of person that Sal Paradise described, and I wanted meet these people too.

In my year of biomed I hate to say, I haven't met these types of people yet. I envisioned a brand new place, of people so full of diversity and passion that we would feed off each other's passion and inspiration to achieve things that they usually wouldn't. I feel I have received none of this. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of nice people taking bio medical science, but none with the vivaciousness to life that I expected. Instead I got a year of insecurities, secrets, competition, deceit and emotional manipulation. 

I feel as though this year I'm losing who I am, I enjoyed biology last year, now I despise it, I feel as though the desirability of a 'friend' this year is based on your intelligence and not your being as a person. I guess I've never been in a educational system that was so cut throat and indifferent towards your emotional needs or feelings. Instead of thriving off the competition I am feeling continually demotivated and further discouraged. I just want to get through the year. And I hate to say this, (because I sound so silly and sad) but I want to make some friends, friends like the ones in 'That 70s show', or 'Dazed and Confused', or 'Friends'. Where are these types of people in biomed?